I found a NYT short video called "Ten Meter Tower" touching and an apt representation of and analogy for trying to work through anxiety.
The shot is set up so we are voyeuristically watching everyday people face a 10 meter leap into a pool. We see their hesitation, hear their muttering, and watch a universally human reaction to facing a psychological fear. It's fascinating to watch each diver in dialogue with their own resistance, negotiating between reason and emotion in a struggle to take the plunge. It's also disturbing to watch for this reason. We understand how uncomfortable many of these divers are. Person after person struggles to do something that is perfectly safe, but mentally terrifying - impeded by an overprotective response.
Watch the full NYT short documentary and my musings posted on my Patreon page...
The payoff for taking the plunge into our intimidating and frightening goals is almost always exhilaration.
It seems too simple, but boosting our general body energy level does wonders for improving the ease of our vocal production. When we can tap into a full-body engagement, the systems of the body that are essential to good singing can coordinate: our core engages and our breath support feels more accessible; the vocal folds compress and vibrate more efficiently; we anticipate adjustments of range and pressure with more agility; our tuning tends to be me more accurate; we maintain our vocal tract shaping and sustain better resonance; we commit our musical intentions through to the ends of phrases; . . . How do we access "Energy" when we're exhausted or not motivated to sing? "Fake it 'til you make it" CAN work! Lead with affect: affect (v.) an affect (n.) for effect (n.).Try working with an intense emotion, like frustration, elation, anger, etc . . . Make fun of yourself. Go over the top. Remind yourself that Energy ≠ Tension. We can energize without tension, and if we commit to that full-body energy, the coordination we access usually prevents tension.
Ever notice that "lightning bolts" look kind of like musical rests? Use that as a reminder to ENERGIZE every time you have a rest or breathe between phrases.
We often want to go straight to the complicated vocal exercises. We reason that we'll rise to meet the challenge - we feel tough. But sometimes the simple exercises give us the most payoff for our time. Try droning on a single note for as long as you can stand - breathing whenever you need to. This exercise should be meditative, observational. Start with a friendly syllable like YOU. How easy can you make this drone feel? Shoot for steady, unforced airflow, and a consistent resonance. Does your resonance change as you move from the Y to the OO? Move through this syllable in slow motion, keeping the air steady through the Y glide and resonance forward as you move to OO. How does it FEEL? If you try this on a word with more mouth movement, and more open vowels, like WOW, can you still maintain a consistent resonance and airflow, the same ease of sound production? Try it out, take your time, get in the drone zone :)
Ideally, we'd all have a practice space where we feel free to make loud, experimental, and maybe unpleasant sounds without the worry of bothering a neighbor or housemate. While this is rarely possible, try to find a way to make yourself feel comfortable letting loose in the space you do have. Concern for others' ears and the insecurity that builds out of fear of judgment only lead to vocal tension and limit our exploration of new sounds and sensations. It may take practice to override the worry, but continue to give yourself permission to take up vocal space. Playing white or pink noise in the background can act as a sonic security blanket and help us feel less vocally vulnerable. Try turning up recorded rain or ocean sounds when you sing - you may find your practice space more conducive to confident vocalizing and less restraint-induced strain.
Singers’ get a bad wrap for the neurotic behaviour and routines surrounding the voice, but almost anyone with a voice is a little vocally neurotic. Whether we are about to sing with intention or about to speak up in class, we all perform some collection of preparatory sounds, movements, or thoughts. These preparations usually reflect our lack of trust in what our voice might produce and the caution we feel before we so vulnerably release it into the ether and expose it to the judgement of a listener. Why are we so anxious about the possibility of phlegm catching in our throat or our voice cracking in public …… ? As with most events that lead to embarrassment, the cause is a lack of control...and that, to most of us humans, is a sign of infirmity, some mental or physical weakness that we are socially conditioned to feel ashamed about.
Controlling the voice is a slippery task: it is invisible, just sound waves . . . air from our lungs vibrates our vocal folds and then resonates in our vocal tract. We can feel this vibration and resonance in our body but the sensations shift and the source feels split between thought, breath, throat, mouth, and the outside world.
How do we gain some sense of security, a modicum of control over our rascal vocal entity?
Warming up as an observation and preparation ritual will help to prepare our mind and our body so that when we begin to add more to our vocal multitasking plate, we are more likely to proceed with ease and efficiency. It should give us a sense of control over our intangible medium, and hopefully, reduce some anxiety and neurosis so we can enjoy our voice and share it with confidence.
To hear me dig deeper into our neurotic vocal preparations and how a 4 step vocal "ritual" focusing on mind, body, sensation, and diagnostics can help you manage and trust your voice, check out my podcast Voice Lab and the upcoming Voice Lab Sessions available through my Patreon page.
When we really care about singing (or anything we’re personally invested in), we can resist or avoid engagement with it for fear of not meeting our own or others’ expectations. In avoiding disappointing ourselves, we can only end up disappointed. When we resist practicing, we compound our avoidance for feeling out-of-shape. When we resist auditioning or performing, we regret a missed opportunity. Whenever we succumb to negative thoughts about our artistic pursuits, we only add to our self-sabotage. The process of singing will always be ongoing with the bar for our expectations always rising. There will always be frustrations, blocks, and challenges along our creative path. As difficult as it is, we should look at these hurdles in our progress as part of our singing process. The next time you feel yourself disengage from singing, ask yourself why. Remind yourself that there will never be a perfect time or space to practice, share your work, or go for an audition. There will never be a finished “product” ready for presentation. If we can reframe our fears of disappointment as feelings of importance, we are more likely to see challenges and hard work as opportunities: we are less likely to give up. We will start to see the creative journey as the goal and payoff. Embrace your voice where it's at today and be disciplined in enjoying the process.
Onset is a term used to describe how we initiate a sung pitch: the first moment of our tone. How we begin a note influences the quality of our sound throughout a musical phrase. If a phrase begins with good breath support and efficient vocal fold closure, good tone is more likely to be achieved and maintained. Conversely, if we don't start our phonation well, it is difficult to make an adjustment mid-phrase.
Here are examples of how we can lead into a sung note:
We can use various onsets intentionally for different timbral effects, however, to protect our instrument and to achieve a "pleasing" tone, we want to shoot for the BALANCED ONSET most of the time.
To get used to finding and feeling the difference between different onsets, try repeating a single pitch in your comfortable range, alternating between the aspirate, glottal, and balanced onsets. Separate each new onset with a good breath. What does your throat feel like at your glottis (the vocal cords and the space between them) on each onset? Do you feel pressure build under your glottis before you sing or do you feel air pass through before the tone starts? Does your breath support change with each onset? Notice the contrast in sensation between each. Can you repeat a balanced onset consistently?
For more info on onsets and exercises to help you find and use healthy technique, subscribe as a Patron!
"Practice makes perfect" is a tricky aphorism. We all know that the act of practicing is essential to improvement, but the questions of what, how, and how much to practice can often feel overwhelming or the answers are just shots in the dark. To improve, we need to work on intentional practice - yes, practicing takes practice. Intentional practice doesn't necessarily mean setting an alarm to remind yourself to sing everyday - although that's not a bad idea. Intentional practice is mindful practice. It is disciplined. These skills aren't easy with distractions, impatience, and the always capricious ignitor, Motivation.
A teacher can help you diagnose faults or set goals and help put in place specific exercises to address issues. But it is your job as the wanting-to-improve singer to implement the new habits (or eliminate the bad). New skills or approaches take consistent revisiting to form muscle memory and reflexive anticipation so that they don't distract from the whole multitasking system of singing. It takes practice to override a day's worth of normal-life habits and turn your body into an instrument.
All of this is to say: try to practice every day, even if only for two minutes, and observe your approach. You will get better at it (practice) and you might even start to enjoy the process of improving your practice. Even if you don't make a sound, remind your body what it needs to do to become an instrument. Exercise the part of your brain that focuses on detail and sensation. Reinforce already good habits with mindful maintenance - don't neglect what's already working. Exercise your enjoyment of singing. Sometimes this takes intentional effort as well.
When your head is balanced squarely over your shoulders, gravity’s pull on that 11 pound noggin is no problem for your neck muscles - weight does not produce any torque on the point of support. However, when your head tilts forward, sideways, or backward so that it no longer sits centered over your shoulders, the equilibrium is disrupted. Gravity then pulls your heavy brainbox down so that nearby muscles have to work harder to support it and your neck 🦒. Too much of this will lead to an overused, strained muscle, which can occur on the front, side, and back of the neck. This can also lead to facet joint (vertebrae connector) inflammation.
Good posture is strain prevention, but when that fails us, motion is lotion ...
Shoulder blade squeeze: While sitting in a chair, sit up straight with shoulders down, and squeeze your shoulder blades together toward your spine. Hold for a count of 5, or one or two slow breath cycles, and then release. Repeat this 3 or 4 times daily.
Bird wing stretch: Place your elbows at your sides and touch your shoulders with your hands, creating your "bird wings." Keeping your hands on your shoulders and your ears aligned with your collarbone, raise both elbows slowly (in the time of a slow inhale). Try inhaling while lifting the arms and exhaling on the descent as well as the reverse. Shoot for multiple reps over 30 seconds, 3 or 4 times a day.
Chin Tucks: Sitting up straight with your shoulders down, draw your chin back toward your ears (give yourself a double chin). Simultaneously, lengthen through the spine and lift upward through the crown of your head. Hold for 2 or 3 seconds and release. Breathe in as you tuck your chin and lengthen the spine. Breathe out on the release. You should feel a stretch in the back of your neck between your vertebrae (flexion). Don’t look up or down, just draw the chin back. Hold for about three seconds and repeat 10-15 times. Repeat as often as you need throughout the day.